


Losing Control

by Lynxxx



Category: Grimm (TV)
Genre: Denial, Denial of Feelings, Dorks in Love, Fluff, Idiots in Love, In the end, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-05-29 14:01:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15074699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lynxxx/pseuds/Lynxxx
Summary: Sean Renard is head over heels in love with one of his sergeants.





	1. In the evening, while Sean is still at work

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic in this fandom, and with this pairing. Hope you like it! Also, the POV changes, and I'll begin with Sean Renard!

“I know I’m in denial. I’ve realized that now. ~~(And now it’s a full-scale war between my mind and my heart, I don’t know how much I can do this without breaking down completely.)~~

It began months ago. At first, I didn’t know what it was. Every time I look at him my heart stops, because he was so beautiful. A few unnoticed and unnecessary glances. It was nothing noticeable. After some time, it grew into something akin to obsession. Sometimes I think I’ve been poisoned.” Captain Renard stopped writing when he heard some laughter. He looked up, out of the office, and saw him laughing at a joke, or something like that, with some other officers. Such beautiful laugh, and that smile. The police captain smiled before he could hinder himself, wishing he could be his. But then the well-known flash of jealousy and shame came and settled in his stomach. If he knew this feeling right, it wouldn’t leave in an hour or two.

 _'I can never have him'_ he thought and sighed. He looked down on the letter he was writing and soon kept going. “But now I’m not so sure. Every time I think of him my heart flutters and hearing him laugh is plain torture. I know he’s my subordinate, but I just can’t seem to stop thinking about him. One of these days I will lose all my control and just go and kiss him. There’s a part of me that thinks that he’s on a secret mission to torture me. I’m sure my miserable state is obvious to everyone in my department.” Renard looked up and realized most people who worked dayshift had packed up and left for home, and the ones who worked nightshift had quietly taken over the place, without disrupting their captain. He put down the pen and stretched his fingers tiredly. And just as tiredly, he put his head in his hands and for a moment the captain imaging them holding hands, openly and without fear and complete understanding. He had been daydreaming a lot lately, about how it would feel if their hands were intertwined, but also less innocent stuff. A few moments later Captain Renard checks his watch and recognized that his shift was over and it was time to head home. He put everything in order and then headed towards his car. Later, when Sean was home, he made one of his favourites, baked potatoes with shrimp mixture. Then he caught some much needed and well deserved, sleep.


	2. POV: Drew Wu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after

Sargent Wu was tired to the bone. He had tossed and turned all night, just because he couldn’t get him out of his mind. He was his boss! It was unbelievable how one could love someone so much it hurt. Drew just wanted to keep his captain safe, even though he shouldn’t. As he put on his clothes and starting on his breakfast, Drew wondered if Hank, Nick and the rest of the precinct would surely laugh if they saw him moping around. After finishing breakfast, and punting on his jacket and shoes, the Sargent went to his car to go to work.  
Wu didn’t know when it started. When he started this job, he was a rookie, new to everything. Now, everything he had ever learned was evaluated. Then he was happy with the friendly aspect of their relation, now all he wanted was more. It just seemed hopeless. His parents would be severely disappointed in him. Their son, not confessing his love! How horrible!  
When Drew was at the precinct, he parked his car and saw that Nick’s car was already there. Going through the front door, he saw his captain’s car parking next to his. Drew felt his heart beat way to fast. Within seconds he was panicking.  
‘I can’t do this anymore, something must happen soon, or I’ll lose my mind!’ Drew thought fearfully.  
Suddenly a hand touched his shoulder. He turned around to see that it was Nick.  
“Are you alright, Wu?” He asked kindly, looking at the Sargent with worried eyes. Drew looked at him with wide eyes and carefully shook his head. Nick nodded in understanding.  
“Okay, maybe it would help with some coffee?” He asked friendly, and then he smiled as Drew slowly nodded. “Come on then!” Nick turned around, went inside and dragged Wu with him.  
In the end, the coffee (and Nick) helped more than Drew thought. The coffee calmed his nerves and Nick helped him focus on the daily tasks. When the captain walked in the door Drew could say he was calm and would (probably) not have another panic-attack today.  
A few hours later Detectives Hank and Nick, Sargeant Franco and some other officers cornered him and dragged him to a bar, in order to loosen up a bit.  
“So… what were you panicking about this morning?” Nick asked curiously, the question made the officers within earshot lean closer to hear the answer.  
“Uhm… I… I…” the question made Drew nervous. He had expected the question to come, but it still made him nervous to think about what he would answer. “It was a random panic attack. It happens sometimes, luckily it was the first time on work it happens.” Nick looked at him as he wasn’t convinced.  
The thing is, Drew wasn’t even lying, he had anxiety that gave him panic attacks. It was all because of their captain. He didn’t deserve to be so beautiful. Then the DJ started a song that caught Drews' ears.  
I drew a broken heart  
Right on your window pane  
Waited for your reply  
Here in the pouring rain  
Just breath against the glass  
Leave me some kind of sign  
I know the hurt won’t pass, yeah  
Just tell me it’s the end of the line  
Just tell me it’s not the end of the line  
Drew saw the door opening. It was Sean Renard. Drew felt himself tensing. He did know if he could do this. Drew felt himself panicking… again, and just like last time, Nick calmed him down. He looked at him as he was trying to figure out what triggered the attack.  
“What is it, Wu?” Wu just glanced at the door, a quick glance, but Nick saw it and followed it right to the tall statue of Captain Renard. “What did he do to you?”  
“Nothing… just steal my heat” Drew said nervously. He looked like he was going to bolt. Nick looked uncertain on how to proceed. He then said:  
“I think you need a day off” in that moment, Hank decided to walk over and therefore heard the comment.  
“Why?” he asked, curiously. Nick answered with a quick headshake, that seemed to say, ‘not now’. While Drew watched the quiet conversation, he took a shaky breath and tried to move on. ‘Okay, let’s face this. I can do this. I can do this.’  
“Let’s take a beer,” he said and moved towards the bar. The detectives quickly followed him. At least it was two men that came with the captain.   


I never meant to break your heart  
I won’t let this plane go down  
I never meant to make you cry  
I’ll do what it takes to make this fly, oh  
You gotta hold on  
Hold on to what you’re feeling  
That feeling is the best thing  
The best thing, alright  
I’m gonna place my bet on us  
I know this love is heading in the same direction  
That’s up

**Author's Note:**

> I will probably not update this in a while...


End file.
